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Four

by David Charles

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1.
This all feels familiar The loss and disappointment I’ve been here before Completely devastated Devoid of inspiration Just balled up on the floor I’m staring in a mirror I’m biting, stubborn, bitter This is a different view Somehow, I’m the widowmaker Now I’m the heartless breaker This all feels so new Each time is a little bit different But for the most part, it’s the same Someone gets burned by the flames Sometimes it happens to a close friend Other times, you’re the one to blame We’re all just fools in a game It’s going round and round A cycle of broken hearts You were at the finish, now you’re back at the start There is a message coming And on the other end Another victim of this pain How do I dull the weakness? How do I cure the sickness? I’m not sure how to explain I’ve been the crying shoulder I’ve been the wounded soldier In a war I didn’t choose It seems stupid and erratic Cupid picks a target He’ll stitch a scratch but make a wound Each time is a little bit different But for the most part, it’s the same Someone gets burned by the flames Sometimes it happens to a close friend Other times, you’re the one to blame We’re all just fools in a game It’s going round and round and round again A cycle of broken hearts They say that in war and love, all is fair They say that you’re not alone, but I find no comfort there
2.
Long Road 02:36
I think I’ll take the long road home Finding peace out in the unknown No need for shortcuts, just inhale the warm air No need to rush, I could be anywhere I just watch the world go by I just steer and not ask why Breathing in the summer sky I just watch the world blow by I think I’ll take a little detour Feel at ease beyond the unsure Heading out around the docks Feel the heat rise up off the sidewalk I just watch the world go by Sit back and let the worries fly Soak it in while the sun still shines I just watch the world blow by Right now, there’s only one thing I miss The simple joy of a simple kiss I just watch the world go by Take a deep breath, let out a sigh Sing out to you with no reply I just watch the world blow by
3.
It all started with a black shirt, blue tie A curious drunken friend who had to ask why I walked away with nothing more than a business card Had no idea what this incident would kick start One month later, I’m in your neighborhood and feeling a little bold You were laid up at home but that’s when it started to unfold Next thing I know, you were counting down the days I still had no idea this was possible, I am still amazed These are sweet memories Walking out the side door at a House of Blues Hopping in the car with someone that I hardly knew I didn’t understand, the idea was never realistic Then I held you for a minute and I was completely addicted Looking out, throwing objects off the balcony Acting stupid out in public on a cozy Halloween Chess in the park, the photo op beside the grassy knoll Lack of sleep, early trips to the airport when I’d lose control Microwave treats, giddy with Dream House anticipation I don’t even care that we never made it out of the kitchen Freezing New York New Year’s Eve When I look at you, I still can’t believe Road trips and fantasies of monolithic domes Someday, they could be the perfect homes Long drives, hotel nights, all those confined spaces Got me closer to you and I am not complaining These are sweet memories All I have are sweet memories of you
4.
Hold On 03:50
Don’t get up, save your health This fight is for someone else Don’t get up, hold on tight Everything will be alright Staring out the window It’s a sunny April afternoon I can’t grasp what’s happening I am just a young man How can I understand? The room is filled with people trying To beg and bargain with the reaper As the breath fills up your lungs Your chest rises and falls for the last time Don’t get up, save your health This fight is for someone else Don’t get up, hold on tight Hope everything will be alright Watching closely now How am I supposed to know when it’s time to let go? Then it happens I can’t describe it There is no question This is the end The room is still filled with people trying To curse and comprehend the reaper As the breath filled up your lungs Your chest rose and fell for the last time Don’t get up, save your health This fight is for someone else Don’t get up, hold on tight Hope everything will be alright Sometimes you just gotta hold on Sometimes you just gotta make time
5.
Just Say Yes 03:23
Want to dance? I don’t have time to waste Just say yes, I will not wait around I want to dance Just want a little taste of living dangerous Been locked away for far too long What I did was never really wrong Being doing time in my own prison The sentence I served was self-inflicted I’ve been immobile for too many weeks Afraid if I don’t move, my legs will atrophy I’ve been squandering all of this space Not any longer, Mr. DJ drop the bass Want to dance? I don’t have time to waste Just say yes, I will not wait around I want to dance Just want a little taste of living dangerous Been kicking myself over every little mistake Every little move I didn’t make Been lying down too long, sitting down bored But not now, Hey Mr. DJ strike that chord Want to dance? I don’t have time to waste Just say yes, I will not wait around I want to dance Just want a little taste of living dangerous Don’t stop keep the floor shaking until the collapse Don’t stop if you slow it down, I fear I’ll relapse Don’t stop now is not the time to sit and relax Don’t stop now it is the time to turn up the tracks Don’t stop the more I pause, the more I face facts Don’t stop we got the rhythm and the beat just right to distract I can’t go back Want to dance? I don’t have time to waste on your timid hesitance Just say yes We’ll make mistakes, I promise you won’t be disappointed
6.
Everything is all the same I can feel you picking at my brain You’ve got that look in your eyes You’re mixing fire and ice You can jump and I will follow You can fall and I will try to pick you up You can die and I will follow You can shoot and I’ll stand in your front of your gun I better forget her Before I’m caught staring and turned to stone I better forget her Before the ground opens up and swallows me whole I can’t see the stars tonight Fireworks and cigarette smoke distort the sight You can jump and I will follow You can fall and I will try to pick you up You can die and I will follow You can shoot and I’ll stand in your front of your gun I better forget her Before I’m caught staring and turned to stone I better forget her Before the ground opens up and swallows me whole I am a sickly, red-blooded man who can’t resist the plastic brand Will someone open up my eyes? Can someone help me see the light?
7.
I’m all alone and feeling sorry for myself I’m still at home while you are living somewhere else I’ve been in a stupor, I have barely moved for days I’m digging deeper, but I just sit here and complain You are so far away My life feels so gray when we’re on opposite sides I long for better, but I wallow in disgrace Somehow I wonder, “Why am I still stuck in this place?” You are so far away My life feels so gray when we’re on opposite sides It’s so hard accepting this is all my fault Despite my lack AND absence of improvement Will you still take me back? It’s a good thing I am used to disappointment You are staying there and I can’t blame you for that
8.
Fool's Gold 03:48
You’re sold, you’re selling out You only want to please the crowd You have nothing at all You’re all flailing arms with your back against a wall You’re sly, you’re a mix Of deviance and underhandedness You lie and you cheat Rising the ranks by any means necessary You’re bought, you’re sold You’re worth about as much as fool’s gold You weave and you spin A web so twisted, you’re tangled within You buy, you sell Empty air to your gullible clientele You’re creative, you’ve fabricated Every achievement in your self-written tales You’re bought, you’re sold You’re worth about as much as fool’s gold You weave and you spin A web so twisted, you’re tangled within You bluff and you fold Your word is thinner than the cards you hold You flip and you flop It’s just a matter of time before your big drop You’re a wolf dressed like a sheep Robbing the fields while the farmer is sleeping You’re a wizard and a trick You leave your mark and get out quick
9.
All I Know 04:16
I know it should seem obvious, but I never know what’s right I never feel assured or at peace with what I decide All I know is I’m the loneliest person now Without you here All I know is I’m falling to pieces I wish you were near I can sense the walls closing around me The belt is tightening, the air is getting heavy I’ve spent months and months searching endlessly Trying to replace what was already working perfectly All I know is I’m the loneliest person now Without you here All I know is I’m falling to pieces I wish you were near All I know is I’m the loneliest person now I wish you were here All I know is I’m still in love I wish you were near It seems stupid now to say I can’t get back what I’ve thrown away I’d like to think I can do better, But you can’t improve on perfection Better get used to it
10.
11.
Withstand 04:03
Polluted light and faded stars We can’t lie about who we are Beneath the glow, I see you Drenched in woe, caked in blue You reached out and grabbed my hand I had my doubt, I took a stand You recoiled, how dare I argue? Said I’ll never make it without you I know you’d like to see me fall I know you’d like to see me fail I won’t let myself get down I won’t satisfy your miserable sounds You can’t grow without my decay I’ve stayed alive, it’s ruined your day You’ll say you fret, you’ll say you care But all I’ll get is more despair Feel the tip of the scale Your power slips, now you’re frail I was a prince, naïve and young Now I’m the king, your time has come I know you’d like to see me fall I know you’d like to see me fail I won’t let myself get beat I won’t satisfy your criminal needs I know you’d like to see me fall I know you’d like to see me fail I won’t let myself get down I won’t let myself get beat I won’t let myself give up I won’t let myself concede
12.
This just might be my favorite memory Soaked from head to toe, wandering alone in a downpour in Orlando Strutting down the center of the street Everybody’s seeking shelter but this weather’s all I need Abandoned and stranded in a theme park Perfectly content to stay drenched, but still warm long after dark The only thing that is missing from this moment is your enchanting presence But even in your absence, I can still feel your matchless warm affection I’ve cleared my head of every thought except for you I think I’ve found the only truth It’s so simple Keep it beautiful This just might make for the greatest vacation I’ll ever take Next to the thrill rides, empty on both sides, everyone else is still inside Droplets are streaming down my face But I’m not crying, I’m not dreaming It won’t stop raining, I’m remaining Completely carefree, there’s nothing I would change The only thing that is missing from this moment is your enchanting presence But even in your absence, I can still feel your warm heart and affection I’ve cleared my head of every thought except for you I think I’ve found the only truth It’s so simple Keep it beautiful

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released February 8, 2014

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David Charles Los Angeles, California

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